When rubber meets the road of life and love, we are weak and fickle. We run, we hide, and throw up walls in order to “guard our hearts”. Our love for others becomes self motivated, fear driven, and dependent on how they treat us or if they stay long enough to prove themselves worthy. Because who in their right mind would love ones who give nothing back and yet still love them for simply the pure intention of loving them?
God would. God does.
We have given him no reason to love us. We leave him, we spit on him, and we consistently show through our actions that he is not enough to (fill in the blank). If God had a group of friends like some of us have, they would have looked at him and wondered why he was being so foolish as to love us with such fierceness and such faithfulness when all we’ve done is be faithless.
Being brutally honest, how often have we looked at God and then at the things in front of us and said, “God, I can’t trust you with this. There are too many what if’s with letting you have this.”
Imagine the sting of one hurt from just one person when they leave, or deem you unworthy, or say hurtful things, or they pass on from this world and leave you with a love so big but they’re no longer there to receive it. Doesn’t it hurt? Don’t you want to throw up your defenses?
Now imagine how many people God so recklessly, faithfully, unconditionally loves. And he does it with no motive, knowing that we could and do say no to him. We say no. Yet he still loves, still waits, still lavishes grace. He doesn’t throw up walls and say, “Oh now you’ve done it, this was the last straw. I can’t let you near my heart because you’ll just leave me once more”. He doesn’t focus on the what if’s of loving such fickle humans. He doesn’t hold off from us. In fact he knows and still loves us. Not the ‘I love pizza’ or ‘I love this song’ kind of way, but the ‘I have sent my only Son so that you may have a way to me’ kind of way.
And he waits. He never folds, he never cuts his eyes at us, and he never stops pursuing. He has defined and so clearly shown us what reckless, never ending, and most holy love looks like. He chooses us when we do nothing in return, when he truly does not need us at the end of it all. He still chooses you, he still chooses me, he still chooses to love.
It’s a love worth dying for, a love worth emulating, a love worth risking it all for.
So here I am, understanding just a smidge more what this undeserved love looks like. Seeing it all through my incredibly small and broken lens of even my best pursuit, my best posture of grace, and my best love in action and yet it still being nothing but a drop of dew in comparison to his roaring ocean of forever love and forever pursuit. Wow.
What a holy and most deserving God we get to serve, we get to worship, we get to live for. Thank you Abba for never folding, never treating me as I so deserve to be treated, and always holding me close though I may not feel it.